Getting it Sorted Part II & Menu Planned!

Waking up at 5am requires my first cup of coffee to be really hot. Every other cup for some reason I can do warm... but the first cup... go figure.

Office Organization Redux

So, the office organization thing... stalled a bit. The help that I was getting had some troubles and I didn't get finished. sigh. However! This Saturday everyone has recommitted their assistance and hoping that we can get everything in order. I've also hired a "nanny"/ baby-sitter to come into our home and help me two days a week. I will let you know how that increases all of the organization and work load on the architectural end of my life... well, that is the plan anyway!

For another delay, we discovered a large nest of a former rodent tenant. YIK YUK YAK!!! So that needed taking care of for good. Oddly, we have cleaned up a lot of mouse crap and nesty materials but only one time. It makes me a bit nervous. Kind of on edge. Do we have mice? Did they move out after the year that there was no food in the house? We aren't sure what to think.

Anywho, we are moving forward with the cleaning up and painting on Saturday! I also took some advice from my friend Jenifer and posted a bunch of my Christmas jewelry on Ebay... happy to report... it is SELLING!! Woo Hoo!! Thanks J!! I am going to be putting a bunch of other things on Ebay now as well with the success I've been having.

Menu Planning

I also wanted to share a really cool menu organizing idea with all of you. I am trying it out right now with a lot of success. I ran across it on Pinterest (duh) and forgot to pin it!!! Who does that?? So I apologize for not giving credit to the original thought maker of this menu plan. I'm a bit naive with a few things in life so forgive me if this is common place for all of you but a stroke of genius to me!

First, I don't want my menu plan to be complicated... If you look at some past menu plans I've tried to work with a grocery list and had to write up the pantry items and keep track of things on hand etc... to sum up NOT WORKING. I need simple. Beyond simple actually... I need zero. So, this meal plan is by type of meal as opposed to what the meal actually is!! Get it??

For example... Your week of dinner could be broken out like this:

Monday - Soup and Sandwiches
Tuesday - Casserole/ one dish meal
Wednesday - Stir Fry
Thursday - International (Mexican, Italian, Middle Eastern... etc.)
Friday - Pizza
Saturday - Leftovers!! or our one night to eat out/ order in...
Sunday - Brinner ( Breakfast for dinner!) because we love brunch.

Whew! That seriously made this week tolerable. Instead of thinking what to do... I have a "heading" for the day to work from. My little brain can think... "WHAT kind of soup and sandwich will I make tonight..." I grab my iPad and go to my Pinterest board now labeled with the above headings... and pick out something yummy!! WOO HOO!!

To spice things up next month I might shift some things around as I get comfortable and make Friday International food... Sunday is soup and sandwich... bla bla bla you get what I mean. I'm doing my menu by month because again... I need SIMPLE. But if you have the need or want for flexibility you can happily change this menu and do this by the week. My husband and I are both creatures of habit and do not mind the routine. And this keeps me from having to worry about the grocery shopping as well. Ever been grocery shopping with a 15 month old? It isn't too bad... but, you have a time limit. (insert smile here)

Other headings could be:
Vegetarian, Tapas, Noodles, Something with Cheese, Crockpot, Grilled, Burgers, Salad, Poultry, Seafood, etc.

You could also label by cuisine type, region, or :

Italian, French, Irish, Chinese, Greek, Lebanese, Tex-Mex, etc.

You get me right?? I'm still trying to get my little templates attached so bear with me... But I've included one here!! Maybe you can print it out. I hope you can print it out if you'd like. If not, email me... and I will email it to you if you'd like. I've started this one with November. But the one I email to you, you can write in the week or month for your own organization!

And let me give you a little more love here... So when I say it is Pizza night... That could be flatbread, bagel, calzone, tortilla, cauliflower crust, crustless, Chicago style... the sky is the limit... SEE... 

brilliant.

Well. at least I thought so. ;) I hope you will too. I am putting together a vegetarian Thanksgiving and Christmas menu at the moment. I've been experimenting with different dishes to see if I like them. I will share soon so if you are thinking of some veggie options off the traditional route! 

Absence Makes the Heart Grow Fonder

I hope you've noticed my absence. Maybe some have, maybe some haven't. Either way. I've noticed it! I have been on a whirlwind weird and wild ride since we landed back in Michigan. Some of it wonderful... some of it depressing, harsh and just down right ugly.

Mostly I've stayed away because I didn't have anything good or positive to say. So, I just didn't! I would start a post and it would inevitably start down the nastiest spiral. I've gotten over it. I have decided if that is some of what I need to say. I may say it. Regardless, I have hit a new higher road with all that has been dragging me down. I am happy to say that! John was on the roller coaster with me. He's also doing a lot better here. He's found a great job at Stryker and started this week! That has made a huge difference in the mood of our little home here on the Michigan prairie.

I thought I would start our return to blogging off with a really, really delicious recipe!!

Zucchini Bread... Don't give me that look!! I know, I know... been there done that. So you know I had to make it different! Vegan and less oil. But then balanced the universe back with chocolate chips. Pure love... Baked love.

I got this recipe from an awesome customer I met while I made my way through the 3rd layer of hell as a part-time employee at Lowe's. Yup. I had a great time! And Robyn made it even better! We all need a job somewhere at different times in our lives. I was lucky enough to grab a great gig at Lowe's while other things in my life were trying to balance out. It was a great anchor... I just put in my two weeks notice yesterday. I've been hired, as an independent consultant, to work on several planning/ urban design jobs for the forseeable future and Lowe's, Xan and John are all competing for attention.

So, Lowe's had to be told good-bye. I now get to stay home and work with Xan! And John is happily working 1st shift and gets home at 3pm!! So, like I said, things are going really well for us again. That isn't a monetary thing, it is just a stability thing!! Feeling like we are on the same road traveling together as a family. So many upsetting things were happening (we will get to them eventually) that we couldn't find our way for a while. I was making every sacrifice I could, so was John... but nothing was coming together. Until two weeks ago. We both had awesome returned phone calls, meetings and JOBS waiting for us on Monday!!

Anyway... until next post... that will be TOMORROW... 

"Happily!", she exclaimed. 

Please enjoy Robyn's recipe handed down from her mom. To make this vegan, substitute flax seed for the eggs (3 T and 9 T of water) And applesauce for oil. That is it!! And instead of nuts, I chose to add chocolate chips!

Eat & Love: Go Vegetarian for Meat Out Day March 20th!

{DISCLAIMER}: I'm on a soap box today. If you aren't ready to hear some honesty about what you eat and how you treat animals and your body... move along to the next blog.

However, if you're really ready to take a look at your soul, how to put good karma into the world, and become a calmer, happier and healthier individual... please have a seat, read on and join me!!

Recently, cooking has taken on a bit of nostalgia. While most families may cook a main dish, a couple of sides, each person chooses to have different beverages and eat what they'd like.

Not my family. I've had the pleasure of dining with my grandparents on numerous occasions with two completely separate meals prepared. Although, I've noticed it is common with families with very young children that they eat something different than their parents... kind of interesting. They eat chicken nuggets and hot dogs while the parents eat chicken breast and salad or some yummy veggies. Huh... why? I digress... back to my grandparents!

My grandparents

Yup. Two pretty close yet very separate dinners.

Eat: St. Patty's Brownies

Happy St. Patrick's Day!! Maybe you've been up since 5am making some kind of kegs and eggs celebration for a local parade... Or you're a die hard Irish fan so you're thinking Rudy and maybe you'll break out the only green shirt you own because it has an ND leprechaun on it. Okay, now that I'm looking, I have 2. Either way, I am certainly the latter!

I was happily attending Notre Dame during Brady Quinn's stint as a quarterback...

We have fond memories of each other in the South Dining Hall.

No Guinness for me this year as I've recently found out that it is NOT vegetarian. Neither is Foster's, Red Stripe or Newcastle. They all contain fish guts. Using 'isinglass' which is made from fish bladders. Hmmm... yuck. And all of my dearest friends know what a huge disappointment this will be to me. I used to love Guinness. Now, I feel a little sick.

On to better things... Like brownies slathered in a mint buttercream. Oh yeah baby!!

These are incredible brownies and not one single time have I brought or sold these and not had a dozen more orders. I think they are pretty special too. I used them to woo my husband. He has a HUGE sweet tooth. I had him over for dinner and I made this incredible polenta dish and then brownies for dessert. We were engaged the next week. I'm not sayin' it was the brownies... But I'm not sayin' it wasn't a factor!!

Brownies {you could make these GF}

Get out a medium sized, heavy bottomed sauce pan. Yup, you read that right. NO BOWL. SAUCE PAN.
Oil and parchment line the bottom of an 8x8 pan. Preheat oven to 350.

Add to sauce pan over medium/ low heat... Go slow... no burning.

1 stick of butter. {I haven't had too much luck with margarine... sorry vegans :(...}
...when melted...
Add 2 T of canola or veggie oil.
...stir in...
Add 1/4 c dark chocolate chips
...melt in...
Add 1/2 c sugar {i've used all kinds to experiment - raw, truvia, etc... raw works best, you can half it with truvia if you'd like.}
...melt in...
Add 1/2 c cocoa powder {i swear by Penzey's. Use amazing cocoa and you will have amazing brownies. That's a huge benefit! You can order it online. DO NOT get dutch process}
...stir in...
Take off the heat. Turn off stove top.

A slow constant stir makes sure everything is getting together and lovely!

Add 2 whole eggs - for high altitude add another yolk. {I've tried flaxmeal... mixed results. sorry again vegans :(...}
...stir in slowly and completely...
Add 2 t of VERY good vanilla. {Not the cheap stuff}
...stir in...
Add 1/4 c of unbleached/ unbrominated flour
...stir in...

Using a rubber spatula get your mixture into the 8x8 pan nice and even. Bake at 350 for about 25 minutes. You should start smelling those yummy brownies just about the time they are ready. Test your oven, of course if you know it runs hot, adjust accordingly.

High altitude folks, I lived in Denver and 350 for 25 to 30 min worked well for me! The extra yolk was KEY in the cakey factor!!

Cool those brownies and get ready for the minty buttercream!

I wish I could say I was an amazing frosting gal... but Baked out of Red Hook in Brooklyn has the best mint buttercream recipe on the planet. So I will be sharing their love with you!!

Minty Buttercream {ala Baked}

3/4 c sugar
2 T flour
3/4 c milk
2 T heavy cream
1- 1/2 sticks of butter softened but still cool, cut into small cubes
3 T creme de menthe
1 T peppermint extract

In a medium heavy-bottom saucepan, whisk together the sugar and flour together. Add the milk and cream and cook over medium heat, whisking occasionally until mixture comes to a boil and has thickened, 5 to 7 min.

Transfer the mixture to the bowl of an electric mixer fitted with the paddle attachment. Beat on high until cool. Reduce the speed to low and add the butter and mix until thoroughly combined. increase the speed to medium-high and beat until filling is light and fluffy.

Add the creme de menthe and peppermint and mix until combined. If the frosting is too soft, chill slightly in the refrigerator and then mix again until it is the proper consistency.

If the frosting is too firm, place the bowl over a pot of simmering water and re-mix to the proper consistency.

This makes enough for 2 batches of brownies :}

May your blessings outnumber
The shamrocks that grow,
And may trouble avoid you
Wherever you go.
~Irish Blessing

photo from whitelotuscooks.com - YUM!!

Eat: Burrito Bowls {vegetarian}

I gave up meat for lent so that I could get back to my roots so to speak. I needed a good cleanse for my body and my soul. Whether you believe in animal rights or not... everything is better in moderation. If you're like my husband you might eat some kind of animal product at EVERY meal and sometimes even for snacks. Yikes is all I say to that. I'm also pretty lactose intolerant... so being vegan as far as dairy goes isn't an issue. I don't crave cheese, always hated milk even when I was a kid and I don't care about ice cream at all... again, I don't care for many milky tasting things. The pain I go through is enough of a punishment to never go there. The only thing on the vegan no-no list I do love is a good omelet... So, I am what you'd call an ovo vegetarian for now. If I ever found a good egg replacement I'd be a full fledged vegan without even trying!

Since my husband and I have a slightly different diet, dinners can be tiresome to prepare for me. With out making a big deal out of cooking each night I usually make myself what ever he's craving and skip the animals. But, through the past two years, I've come up with a great vegetarian dish that my husband adores! I will put chicken in this for him, but mainly he will eat it sans meat. The black & pinto beans provide loads of fiber and protein to keep you full and it is so yummy!

I will also give you two versions of this recipe. The first is from scratch... if you have the time, making your own beans is SO much better and it gives you plenty to stash in the freezer. Canned are good too, and great when you don't want to plan ahead! For the second recipe "I don't want to cook tonight" version can be done at the drop of a hat. I've done it many times. I also threw in my homemade tortilla recipe if you have the energy.

Scratch recipe or not, this is a very good for you recipe and has become a staple in our house!! This recipe makes enough for 2 adults. If you are making the beans you probably will have enough for oh let's say... 6 to 8 adults just be sure to adjust all the other vegetables to chop and rice to make too!

Burrito Bowl {scratch baby}

Love: Irrational Numbers... (π) & Einstein

Happy Pi Day and a very happy birthday (posthumously) to Albert Einstein. It is kinda cool that he was born on sort of a significantly mathematical day... Even if he always said he was bad at math like most Physicists (chuckle haa haa). Of course by bad they mean amazingly beyond most of us. I will be shameless at this moment and tell you that Walter Issacson's biography Albert Einstein is incredible... Read it. Then read it again. Because you'll want to. Great biographer Issacson... His bio of Steve Jobs is equally superb. I am incredibly inspired by biographies and have quite a collection as well as a future reading list... hmmm... maybe we can share that soon!

Albert Einstein born March, 14, 1874

"There are two ways to live: you can live as if nothing is a miracle,

or as if everything is a miracle." -- Albert Einstein

For a little background on Pi Day... it is celebrated on March 14th (3.14) around the world. Pi (Greek letter “π”) is the symbol used in mathematics to represent a constant — the ratio of the circumference of a circle to its diameter — which is approximately 3.14159.

Pi has been calculated to over one trillion digits beyond its decimal point. As an irrational and transcendental number, it will continue infinitely without repetition or pattern. While only a handful of digits are needed for typical calculations, Pi’s infinite nature makes it a fun challenge to memorize, and to computationally calculate more and more digits.
(from the official Pi Day website... www.piday.org)

{I ate some pie... hee hee hee hee hee!!}

If you really want to make a day of it, make a Pi(e) and enter it into this contest on the web!
http://www.instructables.com/contest/piecontest/

If you're like me... there was a time in your life when math, numbers the thought of it all scared the daylights out of you. Just give me a great book to memorize and leave me alone... However, I'm the kind of gal that a number can't back into a corner that easily. In fact, all it took was going into my high school Algebra class and having my teacher turn me away. Yes. That was the moment. I came in after school to ask for help. He told me quite plainly...

"Rebekah, you don't need to be good at math. When will you need it?

Don't worry about it and just get your other work done." -- Mr. You Know Who

My retort 21 years later... "Great spirits have always encountered
violent opposition from mediocre minds." -- Albert Einstein

Love: Spring & Easter DIY

Spring in 9 days!! I hope where ever you are in the world where it will obviously be Spring... is starting to perk up!! The vernal equinox is inevitably a time of change, but unlike fall which can seem more like letting go... Spring is about growth and renewal. If you follow any sort of religious teaching, to me this time of the year, rather than New Year's Eve, is a much more suitable time to make a life change or resolution of some kind. It is the time when applications are due for masters programs... and PhDs... I'm not there yet... but I'm thinking... more on that later.

For me, I am ready for a change of scenery!! I'm ready to see my friends more than once a year and more than EVER I am ready to start making our home, back home, HOME. I am ready for the path that awaits us. We have a trip planned to return home (MICHIGAN) on March 28th!! I'm finally going to see my family and introduce our sweet little darling Xan!! He is going to be 8 months old on the 16th of March. It truly does feel like a time for renewal. Renewal of family and the values that I hold. I want Xan to know his aunties and uncles and his grandparents. I grew up with family all around. My cousins were my first best friends. I want that for Xan. I've been away for nearly 7 years... Seems like the perfect time of the year to return.

For the Love of Cookies

Maybe because having a child creates a scheduled life, or maybe because as we get older time just doesn't seem to slow down like it did when we were younger. Even in my teens a summer day lasted ages! Laying on the dock at Gull Lake. Nine Inch Nails in my sweet cd boom box. Sitting in the sun for hours... Yeah, I'll pay for that someday. I'm sure of it. But I blinked and summer was gone. Well, not here it isn't ever 'gone'. It was 72 today. But in the greater parts of Colorado they are enjoying snow. Oh how I feel robbed that I can't see the snow... sigh. I want to go snowboarding (whine whine). I'm making plans for February/ March. Hopefully, my friend Lindsay will join! And possibly my brother and sister-in-law too! It would be a really great trip to get everyone together. The snow should be stellar then too!

I'm making my Christmas lists today and getting ready to make some gifts for my family. Money has been tight for years... so I've made a tradition out of homemade gifts. It's nice to expect some good care packages with all the holiday parties, I'm sure my extra treats get gobbled up by someone! I've got my traditional baked goods going out, including sugar cookies the size of your head. I've got these awesome huge copper cookie cutters from Williams and Sonoma. I do love them...  As a tradition, each year I've treated myself to one. This year I have my eye on the snowman!

Home Sweet Home

I love fall. I think what intrigues me about fall is that it is such a beautifully colorful transition that ends in such a monochromatic season. I am missing Michigan always at this time. The abundance of trees and foliage makes for the most incredible sights. Here on the prairie it goes from a green/ brown hue to just all brown tones. It's always pretty bland and most of the trees look as though they've given up, but nature just keeps pushing them to sprout leaves year after year. But, they don't care.

In Michigan, fall is natures way of giving you a memory to hold on to. It goes all out like fireworks before winter. Leaving you with the impression of lovely rainbow hues I would imagine to get you through the black and white of winter. I know a few of my friends will be walking about seeing the beauty in Michigan through their fancy lenses as well. I am excited to see their work! My friend Amelia has already sent me gorgeous photos of our home and surrounding area. I'm so homesick...

The shed in our backyard

I also love the monochromatic winter. The deep snow. Really lovely deep snow. The shimmering sparkle on the snow in the backyard. The piles of freshly fallen powder that night groomed just before I plow through it with my snowboard. Crisp air that reminds you what air ought to smell and taste like. The mist that comes from your breath. The chill that I get stepping out of the door knowing that when I return home and walk inside it is warm and cozy. There are blankets I've used since I was a baby in this house. The oven is warm and yummy foods are prepared and drinking hot coffee in my grandparents kitchen. The home that will be ours very soon holds so many wonderful memories. We are about to create new traditions and hang on dearly to the old ones.

Home Sweet Home

Unfortunately, we won't be home until after the first of January. Unfortunate because I really wanted to decorate the house for Christmas. It is kind of a famous Christmas house in our town. My grandparents were on Channel 3 news and in the paper for their pretty decor. A tree in every room. And each room had a sort of theme. Growing up as a kid we had presents under every tree. Yup... every tree. Spoiled rotten the four of us. Somehow we all turned out really great! Not one of us is selfish or demanding. We help each other out every chance we get. I guess it just depends on who ya are.

But, I have some great Christmas ideas to get me through this time of homesickness. I'm making my grandmother's recipes for my family. Homemade caramels, cookies, and cracker toffee. I hope it will help me connect and feel closer. I need that right now. I will share my recipes as I begin making them in a couple of weeks. Please share your traditions and recipes too!

Addicted to Netflix Send Help

Tuesday began as a wonderful day! Monday felt so painfully long with Xan getting up so early and not sleeping on Sunday night. He had a rough time sleeping. I wasn't sure if it was his stuffy nose or if it was his dreams? Or is it my addiction to Netflix?

Yes. Netflix is a terrible addiction of mine... how did this happen? I don't have cable or a t.v. antenna so that's part of it. Instead I have Netflix with scores and scores of television, movies and documentaries. Oh, how I love documentaries!! Watching my wish list of movies is more difficult since they aren't all on instant, but the documentaries are wonderful. When Xan is dozing off in his bouncy seat after a bottle, I rock him and let the Netflix marathon begin! I'm watching all of the Alias episodes right now... Already finished Sherlock Holmes, Merlin, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, and started the X files. Why do I feel so guilty??

I Heart Breakfast

I can eat breakfast 3 times a day. Maybe more! When we lived in Denver we would walk to a couple different breakfast joints. Jelly, Snooze, the place that starts with an M over by REI (LOL)... and Spices. Oh do I miss them dearly! At Jelly, my absolute favorite, it was a constant foodie adventure... what to try next when all you wanted was the same thing you had the last trip. Oh yum. So, I try to recreate some of those delicious experiences at home now. But, honestly... it just isn't the same. I would love to shadow the guy who makes up all the hashes there. They are incredible... craving one now...

If Chicken Were a Vegetable... OH, and Turkey too...

John and I eat vegetarian a couple times a week. I go back to my veg roots and whip up some of my old favorites. But damn... chicken keeps getting in the way of going full time vegetarian for John. I've tried introducing the fake stuff into some recipes. It works in a couple of my comfort food recipes but not when you just want a nice juicy piece of grilled chicken and veggies. Or a good turkey burger.

We have cut out all red meat, and we don't eat pork either. Just keeping low fat and low cholesterol keeps us pretty fit without even trying. I've noticed that when you make a burger or a steak... fried potatoes and other unhealthy sides come into play pretty naturally. And even if ya do just steam some veggies, take a look at a label for what a quarter pound burger contains. Yikes...

Plus, I've mentioned before that we live near hog and cattle farms... uh, yeah. All you need is a little window into the soul of that industry to make you run the other way. I'm thinking that maybe if we moved near a chicken operation we'd be completely done with eating animals. I've watched what some chicken processors do to their animals via Food Inc. and other documentaries. I do not buy from them (I will not mention names). I only buy organic, period. Someday I may even raise my own! Until that day, we will probably continue to eat as healthy as possible. So, I have been looking up some great healthy chicken recipes that I will share with you!

The Budget & Life: Catching Up!

Motherhood is phenomenal. I can't say enough about the reward of caring for Xan and having him in our life. He's redefined everything in the most incredible way. I will speak honestly. It isn't at all the burden that I thought would scare me away from having children at any point. I was terrified in my 20's and into my 30's. Meeting John changed all the rules. And when we started talking about having kids I was honest about my fears. But knowing that we were doing this together finally sunk in. I wasn't doing this alone. And we dove in. Fact is... It's liberated me.

Let me explain. Before Xan I was a planner. Scheduled, organized and knew exactly where and what I was doing. When anything upset those plans (getting laid off, mistakes I made, or any proverbial wrench) I would sometimes tail-spin. It would really upset me as I tried so hard to get back on track. That 'track' is what I've learned, with Xan and John's help... doesn't mean jack. Not without them.

A Week of Pinterest Recipes

If you’re not on board yet... (yes, that’s going to be a pun when you find out) Get ready, as Pinterest will now be part of the catch phrases that we utter almost daily.

Gone will be the days of - "Oh where did you get that recipe!"; “I Googled it.” Now, it will be, “I pinned it” or “On Pinterest...”. The instant gratification is overwhelming. You don’t even have to know what you’re looking for! You log in and start browsing through categories of things you like. Or everything at once if you're looking to be inspired. You are looking at ‘boards’ are specially designed for the visual. Sexy photos that are captioned with just enough information to make you click to find out more or want to see the image bigger. Then you can follow other peoples pins if  you like their style and have similar interests. Many blogs now have links... I have a link to my own Pinterest boards under the ‘Inspire’ tab on the blog. Click it and you can get a visual.

Grocery Shopping & Meal Planning

I'm not going to kid you, the meal planning thing is hard. I've looked up other meal plans and that alone can keep you occupied for hours! I know I'm being particular, but people eat a lot of CRAP!! I can't just download a bunch of other menus... they aren't very good. If they aren't loaded with junk, they are trying to impress me with their Martha Stewart like recipes. Ugh. I couldn't find half of the ingredients where I live. And again... In a few weeks I am not going to have hours to do this. I don't expect I will have ANY time to do this.

I need to get this streamlined a little quicker. I've downloaded a pretty nice grocery shopping app called "Grocery IQ". I like that it has brand named items and gives you coupons too. It also allows you to scan everything into your cart so you know how much you're spending. My dedicated shopping day is Sunday so tomorrow we will see how this works out! I think this week, I will use a little of my "free" time and I will try to come up with two more weeks of menus (with all our staples) and I'm done. We will be a little boring for a bit... but it will be yummy!!

Eating for One (plus a little bit) & a recipe

When we got pregnant my doctor said, "Now Rebekah, you aren't eating for two. You're eating for one and 'a little bit'." I said I understood and was already reading up on how to stay slim through my first trimester and gain just one pound a week through my second trimester, then you finish up only gaining between 25 and 30 pounds. Which was my goal all along. I didn't want to be more miserable than I had to be gaining all of the extra weight in the middle of the desert summer.

I was blessed not to have morning sickness. I ate like a pig. I also started showing early. I don't have a very long torso so my uterus had no where to go but out. By 4 months I was out. I was so hoping to stay out of the maternity clothes for a while. But my belly and my rear end were at odds with my thoughts. My mom and I went shopping for jeans when I was back home in Michigan. They were cute! And comfy at that. I finally embraced the notion I was going to gain a lot of weight and figured that this was the time to do it!

Being proactive, I joined Curves gym. To get out and have a goal in mind. I want to be a fit pregnant woman who breezes through labor because she is strong and able. Of course in the past nine months after reading an incredible book called "The Gentle Birth Method" I realize it isn't only physical fitness but mental fitness that prepares you for birth. I've worked on meditation and even self-hypnosis for the big day. My husband keeps coughing the word..."epidural" out at me... but honestly that scares me more than contractions. I don't react well to pain medication. I don't like taking pills. I don't like feeling like I can't handle something. When you are numbed up you can't leave your bed, you need a catheter, you have to be constantly monitored... here come the IVs... Yeah, not so much my party.

If I could have my way... I would love a mid-wife and a birthing pool at home! THAT would have been exactly perfect. I'm such a hippee... (as John puts it :) In lieu of that choice, I have a good doctor and a caring hospital. They understand what I want and have vowed to try and accommodate my birth plan as closely as possible. Even if I can't have a water birth... sigh. I am Aquarius the water bearer! It just makes sense. Plus, my husband is a Pisces. We were always meant to have a fish for a baby either way.

Will the pain be bearable? I don't know. I've never done this before. I honestly am going to keep my expectations low. I am going into this with the attitude of, yeah it is bearable. My body was made to do this. I will do my best to be present, relax, and let the moment be about my son and I, as a team, making this birth happen. I chose to trust my body. There is a light at the end of the tunnel. This won't last forever. A long time... what seems like it, I'm sure. Forever, no. I have a wonderful husband that I've been telling this 'story' to weekly. Sometimes daily. It is my affirmation. My mantra for labor and delivery. I have music picked out and even great visualizations. I want this day to be about calm. I truly believe it will. And I've resolved that if something, anything must intervene, that it is also the way it was supposed to be. I am reaching deep into my yoga roots for this day. I'm excited about it!

Two weeks ago Wednesday, I wound up in the emergency room with a pain in my chest and back that would not subside. The Tuesday before I had the same pain and I was able to manage it with breathing, John rubbing my back and eating a tub of Tums. I thought it was heartburn or worse acid reflux. But nothing they gave me to settle my stomach acid at the hospital would work. After 5 long hours in chest, back and stomach pain, I'd had 2 IVs, several medications and many out of breath moments. My pain finally subsided into a 'bruised' feeling. I ate half a cracker and a few bites of jello. Of course they had me connected to monitors for the baby, I started to have some contractions... no doubt with all the fuss going on. They eventually stopped and I was sent home to sleep upright as best as I could. I tried to eat in the morning. Toast and jello. Oh my lord... here comes the pain again. My doctor made an appointment with the gastroenterologist for me. I saw him the following Tuesday.

I have wonderful doctors... thank the Lord. I have been taking Prilosec two times a day, and I have a diet that was surprising to me. I thought it was going to be all rice and turkey, toast and oatmeal. Actually, I'm to stay entirely away from wheat, dairy, any high fat or high carbohydrate foods. Lean protein and veggies only. I'm learning that the veggie and fruit list is short. I can't eat asparagus, cucumbers, onions, tomato, cherries (I'm dying here), grapes, or lettuce so far. Broccoli, peas, carrots, cauliflower, and spinach seem to be okay as long as they are over cooked. Apples (small) and snacking on frozen raspberries seems to be okay. As for the veggies, I don't season them with anything. Not even salt and pepper. I've lost 8 pounds in the past three weeks, but baby Xan is doing great. And those pounds weren't doing anything for me or him anyway!

Me at 35 weeks!

I've also been drinking two protein shakes a day. I tried using almond milk, which makes them taste so good! But hurts me... So I cut it in half with water. Still hurts a little, but damn I have to eat something! Rice milk is high in sugar and I just can't do dairy even on a good day. I'm trying to avoid a ton of soy. I've heard about the estrogen link and since I already eat soy cheese and tofu I figure the soy milk was just too much. Sigh. On the bright side... I'm getting creative. And I slowly test foods out. Today I will share my awesome breakfast!

Huevos Rancheros California

I eat egg whites everyday with some kind of veggie. I tried out corn tortillas the other day without any reaction so I've started wrapping them up for a few more calories. Today I went all out adding turkey and avocado! I ate too much which I am paying for right now... as I write this sitting very straight and not thinking of the pain on my right side. Yeah, not just ingredients to watch out for but portion size. I usually eat one half of a meal, then come back to it in 30 or so minutes for best results.

Huevos Rancheros "California"

3/4 cup egg whites
slice of vegan cheese
1/2 avocado
3 oz. turkey
1 cup wilted spinach
2 corn tortillas

Of course this is what I have to eat. You can adjust the ingredients to suit your palette and your diet. Blah and plain is for me right now. Someday I will be able to smother this awesomeness with green salsa or green chili! Even a nice sprinkling of pico de gallo would be yummy. Serve this with a side of pinto or black beans and I think you've got a serious brunch on your plate as well. Sorry my food photography isn't as sexy as some blogs... I will have to hire a stylist I guess!

Today starts my 36th week. Four weeks to term, one week to 'I can go at a moments notice', says the clever doctor. Sigh. I'm so looking forward to meeting this baby. John and I are very imaginative people. We visualize him sitting with us, sleeping, napping, eating, all kinds of songs to sing to him and even what the dog will think when he cries, laughs and starts walking. It still seems like a dream to me though. I guess because I've been waiting for 9 months in a world of instant gratification. Today I'm going to work on my office space and getting a few things hung up in the nursery. I will be sure to share pictures of our spaces soon!