Not my plan... but nonetheless the plan that will be.

On July 10th, a new plan for the birth of our son became necessary for few reasons. The amniotic fluid surrounding him has become very low, without an explanation. I just don't seem to be holding on to the water. The normal range is between 5 and 25 cm. Well, that is a pretty big 'normal' if you ask me. I was 7cm last Tuesday (July 3rd)... I was concerned and started downing the fluids being at the low end of a large spectrum. This past week (July 10) I had gone down to 5cm.

Uh oh. I just froze. How could that be??

John and I both got nervous hearing this. It went down?? I pleaded with my doc and told him I swear I've been drinking a ton! I did not ignore your advice. Good news is... his kidney function is great! So is heart and lung function. But again... fluids... where are they going? Why am I not producing? I'm not leaking and I'm drinking till "my teeth float" as my doctor put it. I honestly feel like it's going to come back up if I drink another sip sometimes! Well, in your ninth month your body slows a lot of the regular functions it was performing because the hormones are now preparing for birth. And your body then begins to rely on the baby to recycle the water through urination. However, Xan isn't doing this very well.



My awesome ultrasound technician with eagle eyes found that Xan has a hernia in his scrotum. This news at first was a bit nerve wracking... It's barely easier to take now that we've sent these pictures to Denver and Colorado Springs. For all the high risk pregnancy docs that have had a glance, it isn't causing huge alarm. Even though these high risk pregnancy surgeons have combed my every detail and Xan's, this condition still requires some concern since the fluid levels, my age, his urination and the hernia could possibly be related.

Sigh. Again...

While normally, we could wait until I went into labor on my own, my doc feels that it will be necessary to help me along. Induction of labor or a cesarean delivery. Not my plan... but nonetheless the plan that will be. Sigh. I have shed a lot of tears between today and yesterday. I feel like I failed. Yet, I know deep down there is nothing in my control here. I guess that is the ultimate mothering experience. Letting go and understanding. I've also become more accepting that I am going to ask for the cesarean delivery.

Because his intestine has slipped down into the scrotum the risk of it being pinched, twisted or compromised in anyway is weighing on me heavily. I just can't imagine a long labor or pushing to put him at risk of having emergency surgery for a partial removal of his intestine just because we didn't do the cesarean... Therefore I cannot go through the labor experience. I feel like this is the best possible option for him and I am healthy and a good healer anyway. I just can't see it any other way now. I'd be a wreck worrying about him through labor. That's not the zen like experience I had imagined anyway.

We will be going to the hospital at 11am on Monday, July 16th. Xan's birthday hopefully! We are excited and anxious to get him here and have him checked up on from head to toe. I can't wait to count those fingers and toes... again and again and again. Just marveling on how perfect they will be to his parents.

My last day with the belly. Sunday, July 15th.